Derailed

A rather grotesque post for a starter.

He stood there in the middle of the track. The train would arrive any minute. His spirit, full of young blood, told him that he alone could take his life. He laughed to himself, a laugh from a man who had nothing to lose. Or so he thought. He pitied the men still living a worthless life, he mocked their cowardice of not being able to do what he would soon do. He had had his share of life’s problems, but he decided he would have no more of it. He decided that he would take the easy way out. He had thought of this day for a month now, and today, he was sure that this would be the end. In a way, he felt victorious, because for once, he felt like he controlled his life, or rather, his death.

He thought of all the people he knew. His friends needed him, his family couldn’t live without him. Maybe he had to go back, he reckoned. But no, he had lived enough for everyone else. This was his moment. A part of his mind continued to fight. This is an act of cowardice, this isn’t how you face your troubles, it seethed. He listened to all this with barely a second thought. He was hoping the train would arrive soon, he wanted to get it over with, because he knew that he was slowly stepping towards the line of sanity. There’s nothing in life that’s bad enough to make you take your life, it went on. But only he knew the pain that he underwent all through his life. He couldn’t take it anymore. He did wish that there was a better way out, but his heart was cold now. The consequences of his action did not bother him. He would escape all his fears in a few minutes, he would be free…

He could see the train’s headlights in the distance. The small circle kept growing in size, bigger and bigger until the train was only a few yards away. That was when realization struck. The moment of clarity had dawned upon him. He must not die, he decided. He would go back, build his life from scratch, he would be happy. He had to get off the track. But his feet were numb, his whole body still from shock. The train was inches away from him and he knew that it was too late. He realized what a grave mistake he had made, and now he couldn’t turn away. No, he screamed. In one last effort, he managed to lift his leg, but the train plowed into him and dragged his body a quarter of a mile. His body was disfigured to such an extent that it could not be identified. Strangely, the only mortal remains which were intact were his eyes. And even in those lifeless eyes, could be seen the anguish of a wailing heart.

Krishna R

II CSE